How Do I Tell My Friends I’m Gay?

So you’re ready to come out to your friends. That’s great! This is a big step forward in creating your self-identity and accepting yourself for who you are. You may be sure of your decision, but here are some tips for how to talk about it with your friends.

Teenage Boys Holding Hands - Teen Rehab

Photo by LGBTQ Portraits Project

Be Confident

Own this. You are in control of this moment so stand tall and shout your news. Even if someone speaks out against your sexuality, stay strong and confident—they can only bring you down if you let them.

BW Teenage Girl Portrait - Teen Rehab Photo by Ashley Campbell Photography

Know Who You Are

Some people spend a lifetime trying to figure out who they are, and lucky you have just solved a big piece to the puzzle. Take this knowledge with you wherever you go and be proud of who you are. When people ask you questions, say this is who I am. Be confident with you are.

Writing In Notebook - Teen Rehab Photo by La Melodie

Be Prepared

There are some people who won’t be supportive of your news, and you need to be emotionally prepared for their reaction. Some people might need time to adjust and come around to the idea but others might outright mad. Be confident and strong and stick to your guns.

Thoreau Quote - Teen Rehab Photo by Son of Groucho

Do It Right

Don’t force your announcement. If the moment doesn’t feel right to tell your friend you’re gay, then save it for another time. There is no rush—you are always going to be who you are. You want to tell them when you’re calm and prepared and confident, not because you told yourself you’d do it Tuesday after basketball practice.

Teenage Girl In Coffeeshop - Teen Rehab Photo by ModernDope (old account)

Explain and Teach

You may need to explain your sexuality to people (when did you realize you were gay, how did you know, etc.) and teach them what “gay” means, or what this means for you. Some people are going to have a harder time understanding and this may just be because of they way they were raised or their religious beliefs. Be patient and do your best to help them understand.

Teenage Girl On Rooftop - Teen Rehab Photo by ndanger


Feature Image: Ted Eytan